You were taught to ‘dream big’, ‘set a goal’ and ‘believe in yourself’. Quaint. But maybe you’ve outgrown this?
Dreams are nice—but they can become tyrannical narratives. It’s also okay to not know exactly what you want in life. It may even be better. Besides: people change—our ‘dreams’, ‘passion’ and sense of ‘purpose’ (if we have such) are thus ‘fluid’ narratives.
Goals are fine—but they only work in stable environments. If you’re training for a competition, go nuts. But if you are attempting to find meaningful progress amidst the complexities and ambiguities of life—you need a more ‘infinite’ approach.
Self-belief is tricky—for it’s a paradox. If we believe too much in who we are, our sense of ‘identity’ can become ossified—making it harder to develop and grow. Believe in ourselves too little and, well… there’s some wisdom in that. Thus we cultivate ‘character’ instead.
Maybe you’re now trying to optimise your life with systems? Good luck. Habits and systems are great—but sometimes the systems we build to ‘optimise’ our lives become the very cages we need to break free from.